Friday, November 12, 2010

Day 12 - Something you never get compliments on - 30 days of truth

My small, perky breasts.

Heh. Actually, I'm assuming it's supposed to be something that is true about me that no one ever compliments.

No one ever compliments me on my ability to sing a quarter tone off with any tune. Wait, that's not true. Uncle Dave does.

No one ever compliments me on my smile.

It's crooked, and I have the proverbial gap between my front two teeth. Lusty, if you believe Canterbury Tales. My teeth are discolored from years of Diet Coke abuse, and if I smile too widely, you will see the splatters of silver fillings that dot several of my molars.

I'm afraid though, that it's not the physical appearance of my smile that prevents people from complimenting me on it. I'm afraid that it's because they don't see it often enough.

As I watch Christopher in a crowd or when someone approaches him to chat - I see myself. He becomes stoic. His lips close, his eyes open wide, and he begins assessing the situation by withdrawing from it to become an observer. He isn't unhappy, but he definitely isn't smiling.

I know I model that for him. It's probably part nature, part nurture, but I would like to model more smiling. I would like for him to hear me get compliments on my smile. I would like to teach him that a smile can truly light up a room. Especially his smile. It is beautiful, and I would like for us both to use our smiles more often.